Wednesday, September 26th, 2007:
Top Toilet Tips Update -
Bishops Arms ladies' toilet
As some of you may remember, I wrote a review of the toilets at the Bishops Arms here in Helsingborg.
I mentioned how it's perfectly normal for guys to use the girls' toilet when it's busy there (honest). If there's a queue and a toilet's free, it's instinctive for guys to go there. You can't fight (Swedish) nature, OK?
But I've recently discovered a few other things as well.
For example, when there's a queue containing both guys and girls, the guys will always let girls go into the girls' toilet.
Very considerate, eh?.
The point being...?
So I was at Bishops Arms the other night and I needed to wee, so got into the queue for the toilets. It was an only-guys-in-the-queue thing.
When it was my turn, the first vacant toilet was the ladies'.
Because there were no ladies present, I went in and did my thang. Sorry, I just love the word "thang"; couldn't resist.
Ourangutan (OK, maybe the first two syllables). Can you tell that I'm a bit drunk? Syllable is a good word as well, but I won't touch it because it's in brackets in the previous sentence.
The füquîng point being???
Yes! OK! The point!
While I was in the ladies' wee thing, I noticed a bin (US/CAN: trash can) next to me. But this wasn't an ordinary bin; it was a closed one and had some kind of sensor above it. With a little waving hand.
It was mysterious.
It looked a bit like this:
This bin seemed to invite me to wave my hand above it. So I did.
The lid of the bin opened and closed gracefully, methodically, and almost clinically. I felt as though I was in a hospital.
A graceful hospital.
But this bin's lid seemed to have teeth or something, and it freaked me out bigtime (like that time I saw a stripping sheep woman).
When opened, it looked like this:
You know, I was a bit drunk, but I managed to snap some shots of this monstrosity when it reared its ugly head. No problem. But what about the old folks, or the immigrants? What would they think?
Not enough thought is given to what could happen to the old immigrant folks, or the monstrous drunks, if they go to Helsingborg pubs. They need to know more about these things, and it's time that the Swedish government did something about it. That's what I think.