Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Wednesday, January 17th, 2007:
Helsingborg: North vs South

What I think:

There's quite a difference between people who live in the northern part of Helsingborg and those in the south. Many people who live in the north are extremely snobby, and often brag about not living in the south.

It may seem like a sweeping generalisation, but it's been proven to me time and time again.

Example One:
A couple of weeks ago, I arranged to meet a visitor from New York at Utposten, a pub in town (neutral territory). He was staying with some girl who lives in an area in the north called Viken, who tagged along with him. Cool, I like meeting new people. I'd spoken to her over the phone beforehand, and she seemed OK (although she sounded absolutely mortified when I said that I didn't know where Viken was).

So I turned up at Utposten with my girlfriend, and we waited for them to arrive. A while later, they showed up, and this girl immediately went into a monologue about some minor bureaucratic issue she was having with her credit rating.

OK, many of us have had some such dealings with things like this, but this girl had to go on about it, mostly so that she could make it crystal clear to us that she had veritable pooploads of funds, and implying that what was being done to her was like being held at Gitmo. This started to get boring, but nevermind.

The conversation soon turned to where my friend lives (actually somewhere in New Jersey, just across from NYC). This girl had spent time there and loved New York. But what she seemed to love most about it was getting ahold of VIP passes for trendy nightclubs.

My friend, well he's not into that whole scene, finding it all rather pretentious and "Ooh-Look-At-Me-I've-Got-Loads-Of-Money". Which, of course it is. But she went on to name-drop a load of clubs (which I know nothing about, nor do I care). It got even more boring.

I talked a bit about the area I live in, in the south, mentioning how vibrant and lively it is, and how convenient it is to loads of shops and markets, etc. She was visibly shocked at my enthusiasm.

The girl pointed out that where our guest lives is in a pretty posh area, and he just replied that he reckoned he made a good investment; nothing more, nothing less. She then said, "Yeah, but you'd never go out with a girl from the Bronx, right? White trash?"

I nearly spat my over-priced beer out at that. This woman had just called everyone from a whole area in New York City "white trash".

She was a snob.

Example Two:
Just last weekend, a friend came over from Manchester, England.

Here's a picture of him:
Yeah, I know. He doesn't photograph very well.

We had a good time going out. He eventually hooked up with a girl and took her back to his hotel where she spent the night.

The next evening, he and I had arranged to meet at my place (in the south) and walk down to the Charles Dickens pub (in the south). So he came over, we had a few beers, and off we went.

He'd also arranged to meet up with the girl he'd met the night before. When she rang him later and found out that he was at Dickens, she desperately tried to get him to meet her somewhere else. Oh yes, she was from the north alright.

He wasn't budging. He was having a good time. When we were playing pool, he got a call on his mobile (US/CAN: cellphone). The girl was calling saying that she'd arrived and was outside. He said that he was inside, and why doesn't she come in, then? He then had to leave the game to walk outside to escort her in.

The game finished soon after, and we all sat at a table. This girl was looking absolutely miserable. It was hilarious. She may seem like a nice person in general, but let's face it:

She's a snob.

Example Three:
My girlfriend was at a work party recently, and was placed at a table with people she didn't know very well. They went through the usual small talk, and GF asked her whereabouts she lived (as you do when making small talk). This girl said that she lived in Maria Park (North). That would have been fine, except that this girl then made a point of going on to say, "Well, it has to be either Maria Park or Viken, doesn't it?"

GF realised then and there that this conversation was over.

The girl is a snob.

Here's a photo of my cat, for no reason:

There are many more examples of northern Helsingborg snobbery I could cite, but it's getting a bit late and I should go to bed soon. I'm going to London for a few days tomorrow and will need to get up a bit early.

I'm staying with friends in North London, I hasten to add. Those bastards south of the river are all white trash.

And it's time that the Swedish government did something about it. That's what I think. (I think.)


Blogger Maritza said...

As a citizen of a New Jersey town that is awfully close to NYC, I can assure you that we are all not all snobby. Well, most of us. Not me. Not a bit. Just some times. Okay, maybe just a little.

1:10 pm  
Blogger Tug said...

I don't do snobs, what with living in hell & all.

5:24 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mark, you live in the fancy area of south Helsingborg - think 'bout those poor dudes living in Hö me....

6:36 pm  
Blogger Shark99 said...

Did she wear Prada? The devil wears Prada.

6:02 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is the time when one pulls a Dock Ellis and either breaks a bar or licks a plate (in the middle of a fancy dining room) to prove a point. He's crass...but he really knows how to put the snobs in place.

Mini-Minus is from the South (of Sverige). She is not a snob. But...I bet she looks at cats with long legs and mocks them.

4:17 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

oops. i'm a newbie helsingborgian who lives in the north, and was blissfully unaware of any north/south tensions. I'd like to believe i'm proof that not all northeners are that bad ;)

3:49 pm  
Blogger An American in Stockholm said...

it's funny that north/south rivalry. i wonder why the southside is so often the "lower class" part.

in stockholm south of söder is no man's land for the posh of stockholm.

i like living among the riff raff. more fun

11:17 am  

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